Photos by Hannah Bacalla
BTS by Michael Chavezwearing vintage skirt, old tee, Parisian wedges
Before I left Cebu, I squeezed in a last minute shoot with the most amazing Hannah. All we did was run around the industrial area and laugh our asses off. I wore an amazing skirt.. high waisted skirts really rock my fashion world as opposed to high waisted jeans, which just look wrong on me. We ran around a bit and she tried to capture a photo where it didn't look like I was hanging out under the noon sun and fighting the wind at the same time. Its always such a delight to shoot with her, so uncomplicated and easy. This is the first in a series of 4.
I'm still in a state of shock, so my writing will probably stay tainted by my grief for a while. This retrograde clearly has it in for me, because I'm just getting one shit storm after another handed to me. Love has been an ongoing topic in my head, usually accompanied by a giant question mark at the end. Love makes everything more tragic, beautiful, interesting, painful. Love can destroy you in seconds, but it can also save your life. People tell me to move on, meet new guys, like that will help heal a broken heart. I always thought I was afraid of being alone, but it isn't me who lives with that fear, its those who jump from one relationship to the next, often overlapping, only having the courage to leave when they have found a replacement, leaving behind them a wake of broken hearts, lies and self-doubt. In an episode of Sex and the City, the question was once asked; When two people part, where does the love go? Does it dive off a cliff? Is it transferred to the next person? Does it linger? Do we bury it deep in our hearts and keep it there forever? Or does it ultimately blacken and turn into hate? One love cannot be replaced by another, just like people cant be replaced.. its never the same. The love always remains somehow. All we can do is keep on truckin', self-convinced and determined to find love again.
So why do I still feel so lost?
I'm still in a state of shock, so my writing will probably stay tainted by my grief for a while. This retrograde clearly has it in for me, because I'm just getting one shit storm after another handed to me. Love has been an ongoing topic in my head, usually accompanied by a giant question mark at the end. Love makes everything more tragic, beautiful, interesting, painful. Love can destroy you in seconds, but it can also save your life. People tell me to move on, meet new guys, like that will help heal a broken heart. I always thought I was afraid of being alone, but it isn't me who lives with that fear, its those who jump from one relationship to the next, often overlapping, only having the courage to leave when they have found a replacement, leaving behind them a wake of broken hearts, lies and self-doubt. In an episode of Sex and the City, the question was once asked; When two people part, where does the love go? Does it dive off a cliff? Is it transferred to the next person? Does it linger? Do we bury it deep in our hearts and keep it there forever? Or does it ultimately blacken and turn into hate? One love cannot be replaced by another, just like people cant be replaced.. its never the same. The love always remains somehow. All we can do is keep on truckin', self-convinced and determined to find love again.
So why do I still feel so lost?
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